One of her three children greeted me and I dreaded the sadness we would soon engulf myself and my two children. I physically touched and talked with each child about how unfair it was that their daddy would soon not be with them but in Heaven.
While at his bedside, I talked with his younger girls about an invisible string that will hold their hearts even when he’s no longer with us. I talked with his son about the temptation to hide his heart and his pain and that I wasn’t gonna let him go down that path no matter how annoying I was to him. You see for the past five years, God in His wisdom was preparing me for this moment as young widow after young widow and their children had been entering my office door. I had spent numerous hours walking beside moms who echoed my sister in law’s thoughts that “I’m not OK but I have to be OK.” I’ve consulted with staff working with their children as they struggle with the grief of a home that few understand as many others move on after the months of the funeral.
Life sometimes is very unfair as in this world there will be MUCH suffering. Ask any of us who sit behind closed doors in forty five minute sessions. This time however it was very personal as I myself sat beside a hospice bed recounting funny memories of living in their home after my husband then my boyfriend ended our relationship and at the same time I was jobless after a church split.
I stood beside a dying father reassuring him that he could leave the pain behind because we would be there for His children. Being the vessels just as he had been of God’s love and guidance.